SAVANNAH
“I’d known Gill since seventh grade. She left letters in my locker, watched me play tennis every practice and official game with her friends, and cheered for me,” Rafe began as he gently stroked my collarbones with the vanilla water. It was as if he knew my favorite scent. But it was more surprising that he played in middle school.
“You played tennis?” I suddenly pictured a young Rafael Sebastian holding a racket in a cute tennis uniform. It was a sight I wanted to see. I smiled.
“Yes. My father didn’t care if I had extra activities as long as I always won.”
“Did you?”
“I did.”
“Wow. You must be pretty good in class too.”
“Never got a B,” he bragged. I felt his smile.
I laughed. “My hot nerd boyfriend. And then? Was Gill in your class too?”
“Always sat in the back. It was impossible not to notice her as she scribbled about me in her letters.”
“I’m more astounded that you actually read them.”
“Not all of them. I threw some when I was annoyed.”
“And you didn’t speak to her about it?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because she was friends with Brett. I avoided her as much as possible,” he confessed. “She knew that.”
I frowned. That wasn’t what Edward said. “I thought you met Brett in high school.”
“He told you that?” he asked roughly.
“No. Edward did.”
“Oh, did he? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I’m waiting for the right time. Edward said Brett and Gill were in a relationship before you dated her.”
“Then Brett lied to his brother.” He sighed. “I’ve known him since elementary. We went to the same music school together, the same middle school, and high school. Ever since then, he’s been a bully.”
That wasn’t surprising now that they ran in the same industry. That part was half-correct, just not the timelines Edward told me.
“Did Gill like him too?”
“I don’t know. I just know that they have the same circle of friends.”
“So this isn’t just about Gill. This is about Brett, too, right?” I still couldn’t believe this huge coincidence between us. We weren’t complete strangers, after all. I was the sister-in-law of his arch-nemesis.
“Perhaps. Because all about Brett was all about Gill.”
I nodded. “And all about you. You have these baffling ties that don’t sever. He’s so obsessed with you, don’t you know? When I was working for them, all he could think about was how he’d surpass you. Like you are in a competition.”
“I never once saw him as my competition.”
I glanced at him. “He’d be so mad if he heard that. For him, you are.” I set my gaze back on the water and rubbed myself with it. “Edward told me something else about the three of you. If they didn’t date, why is he so insecure?”
“It didn’t start with Gill, no.”
“Oh? What happened?”
“He used to be number two. Always number two. He was competitive in school and bullied me since elementary and my … my brother. I was an introvert, had a mild speech disorder, and hearing problems.”
He was like Michael. Only my brother wasn’t able to communicate properly until he was thirteen. “You mentioned that.”
“Brett was their leader. They called me names, stole my things for fun, threw shit at me, and locked me in the bathroom. Gill was the first girl who noticed me when I moved to middle school. I was able to play tennis then and overcame my speech problem. Alas, they were friends. Their families were acquainted too.”
“You didn’t fight back?”
He sniggered. “It’s not worth it. My father was scarier.”
“So when did you and Gill go along?” I turned so I could see his face. It was interesting and bewildering knowing this part of his childhood. It wasn’t easy for him growing up too.
“In high school. We were partners in Chemistry class. I was inexperienced, but she asked me first. I said, yes, sure, let’s date. Everyone was already bragging about their girlfriends. I thought it was time I got one.” His mouth curled up. Gill must be pretty bold and confident to do that.
I nodded. It was when he still didn’t know the meaning of relationships. “You? Inexperienced? That’s surprising. Girls must’ve thrown themselves at you. You’re hot.”
It made him smile. “I didn’t care about that. If I wasn’t at school, my grandfather trained me at the company, making me work for the easy stuff. I learned to earn my own money at a young age.”
“Whoa. I don’t know if I’ll feel sorry or congratulate you.” He never really got a proper childhood.
“Don’t be. I can use those skills now.”
“What happened with Gill? How did Brett get involved? Edward told me you had a fistfight at a party.”
“For weeks, he ignored us as if we were invisible. I thought finally he’d given me peace of mind. But one day, he tried to hurt her… pushed himself to her.”
Oh, God. It was true. I clasped my mouth. “She was already with you, but why was she with him?”
“She was still friends with him and liked to go to parties. It was a part of her lifestyle, and I wasn’t the type to go against what she wanted. She invited me, but I declined. She said she wouldn’t go if I didn’t. A concerned schoolmate called me and told me about it, so I went.”
I heaved a sigh. “So, nothing was going on between them. They’re just friends.”
Brett probably liked her for himself, but he got more insecure because everything he wanted went to Rafael. Success, name, wealth, and this woman.
“Dad found out about it. New Star Media was a big competitor back then,” Rafe continued. “He didn’t want a scandal between two companies, so he sent me to London as an exchange student.”
“I heard she followed you.”
He shook his head in disbelief. Then he gently grabbed my hair and reached for the shampoo. “Just what else did the younger Reed tell you, mm?”
“Only those. But I promise I didn’t believe him. I want to hear it from you.” He squeezed the bottle, put a handful on his palm, and then started massaging it on my hair. I hummed in pleasure while inhaling its sweet flowery scent. God, he was good at this. His hand was light and careful on his scalp. Did he do this with Gill too? I closed my eyes and let go of the negative thoughts.
It wasn’t proper to be jealous. It was all in the past.
“She did follow me. I thought we could continue where we left off, but I couldn’t.”
I purred. “Did you live together?”
“No. I couldn’t give her more. She lived close to my apartment. I was too busy with my own life to give her time.”
“Let me guess. Family duties?”
“Can’t escape from that.” He lifted a bit to grab the sprinkler shower head and rinsed my hair. “She demanded my time, so we tried for a few months. But I couldn’t give her more than she wanted. Marriage. She wanted to get married after we graduated.”
I grabbed his hand to stop him. “Right after high school? That’s not normal.”
“Naturally, it shouldn’t matter for people like us. Our future was already decided. She still gets to be an heiress of her parents’ venture, and I, with my family’s.”
People like them. People that weren’t me. “So why not, Rafe? When she was obviously fit to be your wife.” I tasted bitterness on my tongue.
“I was young, and my world revolved around family, and I saw how my mother suffered with her marriage. I already told you that. Dad gave everything to duties that he forgot his obligations to his wife and sons. He is physically present, but his heart and mind are somewhere else.”
Right. The duty of the firstborns. His dad was the eldest, so he dedicated his everything to expanding their empire instead of taking care of his family. Or he probably thought he was taking care of them by giving them wealth.
“You cared for her, Rafe. You just couldn’t admit it, then. Because why else would you be bothered by those?” How about me? Did he worry about that for me when he asked me to marry him?
“I did, but that’s all. I can’t love her, Savi. I can’t bring myself to do it.”
I cupped his face. “You can, but you didn’t try.”
“No, I tried. That’s why I experimented with her. I manipulated her feelings and acted as if I loved her. When she felt something was wrong, I led her on. I took her innocence, and I asked her to stay. I thought I’d feel something for her or even get possessive over it… I didn’t. Eventually, I asked her to leave.”
Distaste was marked in Rafe’s eyes. This was why Edward said those things to me before… Rafael Sebastian wasn’t capable of feeling… love… Gill must’ve told Brett about it.
But that was in the past. He was different now.
“I told you it’s ugly. I just couldn’t feel anything.”
“Where is she now?”
“Probably traveling or working in her parent’s company. I don’t know.”
I watched the expression on his face. “Do you still feel that way?”
“What do you mean?”
“Do you feel like manipulating me too, like Gill?
“What?” He shoved his fingers into his wet hair. “Fuck, Savi. I can’t even think of hurting you in any way. What is it with you and your habit of comparing people?”
A large spike in my chest had loosened. “It’s just… I told you I’d listen, so I wanted to know the truth, however ugly it was.” I chewed my bottom lip. “Sorry.”
His gaze softened. I couldn’t see anything but his affection. “Savannah, you’re the only woman I ever let in. I don’t know what I do anymore whenever I’m with you. I’m only acting on impulse now, so it’s different. With you, it’s unknown.”
“Thank you for telling me all this and for trusting me.” I curled against his body and leaned on his chest, loving how he felt something for me.
This was more.