AMANDA
Without waiting for an answer from Adam, I go out, return to the bedroom, and need to get ready. I want to see my mom, I want to talk to her, to hug her. I really miss her; I have needed her support so much all this time. We have never had a warm relationship, but only after losing her did I begin to realize how dear she is to me. So I put on a comfortable tracksuit and head out. Adam continues to stand on the balcony. And I think about whether it’s even worth bothering him right now or not.
- Adam, I'm going to mom's hotel. - He looks at me and approaches.
- Do you want me to give you a ride? - The question gives me a choice.
- No, it's not necessary; I'll go with the driver. We'll see each other tomorrow. - I need time to think everything over. I think he does too. So I leave, get into the car, and drive to the hotel.
I don’t know why I’m so nervous. She is my mother after all. Yes, I thought she was dead. In truth, I have experienced too many losses in these three months. But still, I will see her, and that is the most important thing.
At the hotel, Korneyiev greets me. I called him and said I’d be arriving soon.
- So, daughter, are you ready? - Somehow this question sounds so strange. I never thought I would be so nervous before meeting my own mother. We go up to the hotel room, enter, and my mom literally throws herself onto my neck.
- My daughter, how I’ve missed you. Oh God, what happened to you? - She looks at my lip and cheek. And I’ve already forgotten that there are still bruises and marks from the punch on them.
- Mom, everything is fine. I’m happy you’re alive. - I hug her tighter, and we stand like that for a few minutes. I don’t want to let her go because I’m afraid that if I do, she will just disappear. It might turn out to be a dream of mine or, for example, some hallucination after the blow.
- Daughter, come in, I ordered us dinner. - We walk in and sit at the table together. I start telling her everything that has happened over the past three months. About how I lost the baby, how hard it was for me, how I didn't want to come back here. About everything, everything, everything. And my parents tell me their story. Now, from the beginning, in all the details. And I realize how much these two have gone through to be together again. How much they had to spend and lose in order to preserve their love. And against the backdrop of their conversation, I wonder if we can do the same? Does that love still exist?
Today I am disappointed in him once again. He promised me that there would be no secrets between us, but he didn’t keep that promise. And it hurts. I don't know if I can trust him again. Although deep down inside, I understand his action. He wanted to protect me.
He was concerned about my safety, that’s why he didn’t tell me about my mother. But he gave his word. As it turned out, Kelly's word means nothing. Even the promise he made to me turned out to be just a lie. I look at my parents, who are holding hands, looking at each other as if the whole world around them doesn’t matter.
- Daughter, something happened, - Mom looks at me, and I see a question in her eyes.
- No, everything is fine; I’m just a bit tired. - She smiles and takes my hand.
- Everything will be different now; we will never leave you again. - Korneyiev also smiles and hugs my mom.
- It’s good that you’re back. Now the business will definitely be safe. - Korneyiev smiles again, and something about that smile I don’t like at all.
- Daughter, it was always safe, and it will remain so. - I don’t quite understand what he is hinting at.
- Because you were always watching over it?
- No, because you were in charge of it, and you will continue to be. I do not plan to return to business. I want to finally start living. To spend time with the woman I love, spend time with my daughter. We have so much to catch up on, and there isn’t much life left ahead. - Mom looks at him with a gaze she has never looked at Vitvitskiy. - So, Amanda, this business is entirely yours. I’m sure you will handle it perfectly. Besides, I will always help. And there’s also Victoria and Adam. - Remembering the last one, I lower my gaze.
- Ami, did something happen? - Mom probably senses that I’m holding something back.
- Not really. I’m just confused. - For some reason, it’s hard for me to talk to her about it. We have never been very close. And now it feels like there’s a chasm between us.
- Daughter, you can always tell me everything. - Mom scoots closer to me and hugs me. - No matter what happens, we will deal with everything together. You are my little Ami. - She pets my head, and I’m ready to cry. I haven’t felt such warmth in many, many years. I ran away from here seven years ago, blaming my parents, Adam, everyone in the world. And I never even thought about talking about that situation. But everything could have been entirely different.
Korneyiev looks at us and smiles.
- Amanda, we will get through everything, I promise you. - And he hugs both me and my mom.
For the first time, I feel at home. And I feel protected, knowing that there are people by my side who will never let me down.
- Regarding the business, I didn’t quite understand something. - I somehow let his words slide by.
- What exactly do you not understand, Amanda? The business fully belongs to you. I don’t want to return to it. I just want to live. And you are young, and you have time to build something big. I believe in you; I know you will succeed, my girl.
These tears make me want to cry. Cry from happiness. He believes in me, so much so that I don’t even believe in myself. And that means a lot. I stay with them until morning. We talk all night long. I tell them about some moments from my childhood. I share how I lived these seven years. They share their stories. I feel like I’m at home. I feel so good that I don’t want morning to come. But I know that it won't be possible to escape from that. And the situation with Adam is not yet resolved. And I need to make a decision. A decision that will forever change two lives.
In the morning, I text Adam and schedule a meeting. The time has come to put all the dots in our story.
I arrive at the restaurant a little late; he is already there. I see he hasn’t slept all night, his eyes tired, dark circles under them.
- Hi, Kitten, - he stands up to kiss me.
- Hi, Adam, - we sit across from each other. Silence hangs between us, and neither of us is capable of starting. Because everyone understands that right now it can either be the end of everything or the beginning. And none of us is sure which option awaits us.
- Kitten, I want to say... - Adam falls silent.
- Adam, no need. Let me speak. - Gaining courage, I take his hand. - Adam, I need some time to be alone. I don’t want to build any relationships right now. I am not ready for that. I need to figure things out with myself first. Something has changed in me lately, and that something doesn’t let me rest. I can’t be close to you while making you unhappy. I don’t want to do that. You have already suffered too much pain because of me. Let’s pause everything for now. Let’s each live our own lives. - Adam looks at me in a way that makes me want to rip my own heart out and throw it out the window.
- Kitten, please, don’t. - He squeezes my hand, and I understand that I don’t feel anything. Maybe I do feel something, but I’m forbidding myself those feelings. I’ve made my decision, and it can’t be otherwise now.
- Adam, no. It has to be this way. I’m sorry, I’m not ready. - I stand up and leave the restaurant. I don’t even have tears in my eyes. Have I really become that cruel? Do I really not sympathize with him? Although I know deep down it hurts me. It hurts me profoundly that our life has turned out this way. And that we couldn’t return what there was before.
Do I love him? Maybe. But this love hurts both of us. This love can destroy us. And I don’t want that. I want us to live. Even if separately. I get into the car and drive away. My life will change from now on. It will change significantly. And whether Adam and I will meet again – who knows.
I get out of the car, my head buzzing entirely with thoughts about what to do with the business that Victoria is currently handling. My parents decided to stay in our city and live in Korneyiev’s house. So, I can live with them or one of my own apartments, but I choose a different path again.
- One ticket to London, please...