Trailing from a lazy relaxing bath wrapped in a fluffy dressing robe, Rose submerged herself in her illustrations without bothering to stop and dress or even brush her hair. Her cosy room with art on the walls and her supplies lined up neatly, easy to reach and see.
Rob was right about one thing; the new rooms and space he created for them would be well-loved, like having the cottage inside the manor. A place to pad around half dressed, a paintbrush in her hair, bare feet and chilled. Music was playing softly in the background as she worked. Surrounded by their own little world, freshly created just for the two of them. She looked forward to its completion more every day and the excitement growing.
They had poured through charts in bed the night before, choosing colours and wallpapers and some of the fitted furnishings in readiness, and she had to admit, it was something she was looking forward to. The interior designer had already begun mood boards and layout plans, the work moving along swiftly, seeing as there was not too much that was structural. Rob had impeccable taste, but he was giving her free rein to make it anyway she wanted, knowing it mattered more to her to have the homely part of the house than it did to him. Their little love nest, her own breathing space, a place she felt like she belonged rather than just hanging out at his house.
She could hear Muffin scraping at the back door, whining to get out. His can of food from earlier obviously wanting to exit soon. It had grown darker, and Rob would be along soon, so she didn’t have time to walk him. Well, she had promised she wouldn’t. Opening the back door into his little enclosed garden, she left it swinging in the cool air and headed back in to pull some clothes from her half-empty wardrobe. Thinking she should move more of her clothes and start going through the shoes under her bed once the house calmed down.
Rob had been at her to move in with him officially. Meaning to finally take every last piece of her up to the house once and for all, and she had been dragging it out. She was sure that she wanted to but unable to let go of this place so easily. Somehow, having the excuses to get things as she needed them, leaving her an opening to come back and forth had made it more bearable. Not that she needed reasons. She knew he wouldn’t have an issue with her coming here anytime she wanted to chill out or work. She just wasn’t ready to let it go. She had not yet felt it was time to say goodbye to the cottage.
It was as though she sensed him approaching, and as headlights pulled into the car park, shining through her small windows, she pulled on her jeans quickly. She was done for the day anyway. The last hour of painting was spent absently fussing and reviewing minute details that didn’t need touch-ups. A sign she needed a break and a fresh start tomorrow. She wanted nothing more than to go home with him for dinner and some much-needed Rob time, alone in whatever bed they were using tonight.
He knocked on the door before walking in, meeting her in the hall as she slid on her shoes; she reached up to receive his kiss as he asked if she was ready.
‘I need to go call Muffin in. He’s out back doing his business.’ She wandered through the lounge, pushing a bag towards him that contained more of her clothes, and he lifted it dutifully with a smile.
Going to the back door and calling her little dog's name, she waited patiently, the darkness moving in fast, and she began to get irritated with his lack of response or appearance.
‘Muffin? Here boy!’ she made kissing noises and clapped her hands, her usual call to return to her. There was silence, and she strained her eyes to look into the dim garden, cursing that he may have found an escape route and had used it. He was occasionally a disobedient boy when he saw something to be getting into.
Rob called her from the front door, asking if she was coming, and she called back to wait a minute. He was waiting, having already put the bag in the car, his engine still running and wondering what the holdup was.
‘Muffin!!!’ Rose was losing her temper and moving out into the garden impatiently, her eyes adjusting to the darkness. She caught a glimpse of his light furry butt beside the kennel and shook her head in annoyance at him.
‘I swear if you’re trying to dig your way out, Mr, I’ll have serious words with you.’ Getting closer, she realised something was wrong, the way he was lying on his side motionless and had not peeked back at her at all, even though he had been caught red-handed
‘Muffin, baby?’ She said more gently, a knot of fear rising in her stomach as she shuffled closer to him, sending panic rising to her throat; a sense of fear riding up instinctively.
Saying his name softly again, her voice shaking, she moved forward cautiously. He was laid out, panting heavily. His small tongue flopped out onto the damp grass, salivating profusely, his eyes wide and glazed over. Unresponsive to her, even in the semi-dark, she could tell something was seriously not right, sheer panic overtaking her.
‘ROB! ROB!’ Rose began yelling hysterically, crouching down, afraid to touch her little fluffy bundle but visually searching for signs of injury. Frantically roaming his lifeless little body with her eyes and fingertips for signs of cuts or blood, her hands shaking wildly, and her heart bursting through her chest. Tears were streaming down her face as she tried to get him to sit up. Begging him to be okay and talking to him through a flurry of sobs. Rose was pleading for him to raise his tiny head, her nose almost touching the small dark brown nose as he lay motionless with glazed fixed eyes on nothing and no change to his rapid breathing.
Rob’s footsteps moved fast across the grass towards her as Muffin’s tiny body started to convulse, a deep gurgling from his throat sending her into instant panic and hysteria. Unable to react, frozen in fear but clutching at Rob’s arm as he slid down beside them, grabbing the tiny fur ball in his hands and tipping him up, his nose and face pointed towards the ground.
A surge of yellow vomit poured out, mixed with undigested food and grass, the gurgling and twitching subsiding after a few moments. Rose began crying loudly, her hands over her face repeating …
‘Oh my god, Oh my god’ as her heart wrenched into a million pieces and she completely fell to bits. Rob jumped to his feet, looking around for signs of what he’d eaten as the small animal convulsed again, with more vomit pouring from his mouth through half-open teeth.
Rob turned quickly, motioning Rose to follow and pulling his jacket off so he could wrap the dog gently inside and keep him warm. Leading the way back through the cottage, trying to get Rose to come with him and calm down, all she could do was grip the hem of his shirt, like a lost child, unable to function on any level, blinded by tears and murmuring incoherently through sobs about her ‘baby.’
* * *
The drive to the emergency vet felt endless. She sat cradling him, crying and sobbing and holding his limp body wrapped up like a newborn baby. He was cold and non-responsive and had long closed his eyes on the journey. She repeatedly told him he was a good boy and not to be scared while tears streamed down her face, and she kept looking to Rob for reassurance.
Muffin felt cold and alien to her, his normally hyperactive little self like a wet rag on her lap. Rose’s tears were blurring her vision, so she could barely see, her nose running, and her speech almost unintelligible as Rob tried to talk to her. All she could do was tell Muffin repeatedly that he would be okay.
Rob was on his mobile, driving at speed and getting directions from the vet about where to go, not caring if he got a fine for being on his phone and too rushed to stick it to his blue tooth. He looked like a man on a mission, with furrowed brow, serious tone and driving like Schumacher, with all concentration on the road and the voice on the other end of his phone.
It was late, but the Vet was still open and awaiting their arrival. Rob kept leaning forward in his seat, looking to the side and around for openings and exits as he followed directions to a place he had never been, fixating on getting them there as soon as possible.
Muffin’s little eyes were streaming fluid and kept opening and closing, losing the fight he had left and making Rose even more hysterical in the process. She tried not to shake him, to stop freaking out, but her panic was taking control. She had never been more petrified in her life and had no sense of control or ability to navigate how to deal with this, he was like her child, and she was completely overwhelmed with terror at losing him.
Rob was calm and quiet, always the man of control in a crisis and being her rock right now with his steady cool presence and a clear head. Turning the car smoothly into roads and corners, glancing in his mirrors repetitively, he kept leaning over and feeling the small animal's throat, holding his fingers to his nose to check his breathing before shifting gear and speeding up. Every so often, he would squeeze Rose’s knee to tell her he was right there with her and would do anything to get Muffin help. He was the only reason she hadn’t completely gone over the edge.
Rob had to restrain Rose when the vet took Muffin through the surgery, crying and trying to cling on, not thinking about what she was doing. Lost in hysteria and clinging to her precious fur baby, afraid it would be the last time she saw him breathing and knowing he would be scared without her by his side.
‘Rose?...Rose! Look at me. You need to let them do their job. He‘s in the best place. Trust me, baby, let him go.’ Rob was grabbing her flailing arms, turning her to face him and trying to wipe the wetness from her face. Pained by the puffy red eyes, tear-streaked face and look of despair, he could see there. Rose didn’t respond, just collapsed against him and let out a new tidal wave of sobs, his hand cradling her head against his chest protectively. He moved her to the waiting room and sat her down on his lap, pulling her up easily and sweeping her into a hold like a child, smoothing her hair until she began to calm again, and the wracking sobs became more of a simmering bout of sniffing.
An hour passed, and she sat looking numbly at the door, held against him, breathing steady and quiet but silently watching, blankly waiting, and finally completely calm from sheer emotional numbness. She had cried herself into silence until no more tears could fall.
Rob tried to get her to drink coffee while watching that white door leading to the treatment room, endlessly holding her breath and pushing away his offerings of cups or snacks. Chewing the edge of her nails and tapping her foot listlessly against his leg, she felt like the waiting was going to make her insane. Rob didn’t stop her. He just held her close and stroked her hair, knowing the agony of the endless waiting was torture for her and just trying to be what she needed at that moment.
Finally, the vet appeared, and she jumped up, racing towards him at speed and almost taking down the magazine rack that stood in the way. Rob barely kept up with her as the man raised his hands, obviously used to distraught owners. Bringing calm and quiet with a gesture and a sympathetic smile.
‘He’s stable and sedated.’ The man said softly, Rob coming up to slide his arms around her shoulders behind her.
‘Any idea what’s wrong with him?’ Rob’s deep voice over her head was calming her manic panic, unable to form questions of her own and searching the man’s face for any clue to an answer.
‘There’s a chance he has ingested something highly toxic, either a plant or something left in your garden. The way you said he threw up in the garden has probably purged his system of whatever it was quickly. Most likely saving his life. He’s sedated and medicated, and we must await blood results to be sure of what he has poisoned himself with before we can truly treat him. We are treating him with standard meds and saline and will have to keep him in to be watched.’ The man’s no-nonsense attitude and serious tone had Rose numbly nodding, unable to think straight and still letting Rob take the lead.
‘He’s in the best place. I trust you will do what you can for him and keep us updated.’ Rob pulled Rose closer as though looking for any response. All she could do was stare wide-eyed around her, trying to take in that her baby would be here without her and scared.
‘We will call if there is any change, and you can come in after noon tomorrow to see him. We will have the bloods sent out first, but they take a day or two to come back.’
‘I want to see him, now.’ Rose broke in, her voice weak and cracking with the effort, fresh tears filling her eyes.
‘He’s asleep for now....’ The vet started, but Rob moved Rose aside and stepped in.
‘Look, she won’t rest if she can’t see him. Just a few seconds to see he’s breathing and give her some peace of mind.’ Rob was in a business tone, and although friendly, there was a forceful underlying tone.
‘Okay, a few seconds.’ The vet relented, knowing a stubborn man in his face when he met one.
The vet led them through a little room with cages built into the walls from floor to ceiling. Muffin was lying motionless inside a shiny steel cage, a furry blanket below his fragile little body and a lighter one keeping him warm. One of his tiny little legs was poking out above the cover, shaved and a drip taped in place, keeping him hydrated. His poor little face was drenched from runny eyes and nose, and his white muzzle was stained yellow and brown. He was breathing softly and slowly, sound asleep and looking more peaceful than before, more alive. There was a shallow dish of water nearby and puppy mats lining the cage floor around him, but he seemed so helpless and small.
She heard the vet telling Rob they had pumped his stomach to be sure whatever he had ingested was completely gone and felt a fresh wave of tears. Touching his little face through the bars, the urge to pick him up and kiss his little velvet muzzle overwhelmed her. She whispered to him through the bars.
‘Good boy. I love you, puppy. I’ll come back tomorrow. Don’t be scared, baby. You be a brave little boy for Mummy.’ Tears wet her cheeks as Rob finally managed to drag her away from the bars. Saying something to the vet, walking her out of the building in a firm embrace, and giving her no chance to fight him on it. She could barely function, her brain unable to formulate anything but extreme grief.
She stopped in the car park, suddenly aware of rising nausea, a product of her hysterical crying and emotional torture. All were coming dramatically bubbling to a head. She threw up in the bushes with Rob cradling her against him and holding back her hair. Softly saying things to try and soothe her, she pulled away angrily, pushing his arms off her and stomping away to pace erratically.
‘She did this!’ She screamed, pointing back at the medical building accusingly. ‘She poisoned him!’ Her voice was hitched, and tears were once again flowing freely.
Rob’s face tightened, a frown appearing, and he softly shook his head at her, reaching out for her, but she waved his hands away as he got closer.
‘Rose. I don’t think this was deliberate.’ Rob followed her across the car park, trying still to get hold of her once again, endlessly patient with her outburst.
‘Yes, it was! She did this to him!... She did!...’ She broke down again as he came to her side. Sliding arms around her, she pushed him off, not wanting to be consoled. A fresh wave of rage and hatred she had never felt for that woman was almost consuming her.
‘You said it yourself. She made threats. She wanted me gone!’ She blurted out.
‘Rose, you’re upset. You’re not thinking straight...’ No matter how far she paced away from him, he still followed her, trying to pull her into his embrace.
‘Don’t you dare use my own words against me!’ Rose turned on him, yelling, unable to control it while he was trying to figure out how to respond to her like this. ‘He’s innocent! He would never hurt a fly... He’s just a tiny little animal who never bothers anyone.’ Rose cried out, sobbing; self-pity wracking her as she paced around the car park once more, unable to stand still as adrenalin coursed through her blood and her body shook with the after effects of shock. ‘She’s trying to get to me! To hurt me... She can‘t take you away, so she’s taking something else I love!’ She stamped around, kicking rocks away on the gravel surface.
‘Rose,...?’ Rob was looking for the right words, trying not to make her worse. ‘I think this is just what it is... An accident... The weather lately has been damp and colder. Stuff grows in the garden when it’s like that. Fungus and plants that are toxic. I think he just ate something he shouldn’t have.’
‘You’re building Fort Knox up at the house and I’m over reacting because someone poisoned my dog?’ She was livid, the tears still falling, her nose running as she rounded on him accusingly, meeting him and pulling herself up to try and match his height. She was in full on battle mode now and wiped her tears with her sleeve.
‘You’re right! This is on me... All this paranoia and overreaction. I’ve filled your head with this crap, made you think she’s out to harm you. That’s my fault Rose. I jumped ahead and never thought things through, it was a knee-jerk reaction and I see now it’s complete nonsense. Morag wouldn’t poison Muffin, she wouldn’t come after you in that way and she sure as hell isn’t stupid enough to jeopardise her career and her life in this way.’ Rob raised his palms defensively, giving up on following her and instead taking a calmer approach.
‘No, she would just smash up your house and slice her own arms open¡ Rose spat back at him, throwing her hands up.
‘Rose you need to calm down. Think rationally about this.’
‘Why can’t you see it?’ She cried in exasperation, pushing him in the stomach as though trying to make him see sense, completely over wrought with emotional frustration. Rob, realising he was only making her worse, pushing her further into a fight, changed tactic. Lifting defensive palms again and slowly moving towards her as softly as he could, soothing voice and soft words.
‘I believe that you think she did this baby, I just want to take you home right now.’ Rob was now level with her, a hand sliding over her shoulder carefully, she fought him off again, only this time with less fight and he sensed she was wavering. Her energy finally spent.
‘She did this Rob.’ She announced hopelessly, resigned to more quiet tears as exhaustion overwhelmed her.
‘Blood tests will tell us for sure Rose, there’s no point speculating anymore until we know for sure, okay? Let me take you home. You need to sleep, and I want to look after you.’ Rob slid his arms about her shoulders finally, meeting no resistance and instead she slumped against his body, allowing him to do whatever he wanted.
She nodded numbly, unable to yell anymore, unable to fight, just exhausted and broken, longing to pick up her little fur ball and rub that tiny nose on her face. He manoeuvred her slowly, hugging her close and leading her to the car, treating her with kid gloves and buckling her into her seat. Kissing her temple gently as he clipped her into her seat and driving them home in utter silence.
* * *
She laid in bed watching every hour on the clock, Rob was lying beside her in the dark, his arm across her, but he knew she needed to be left alone with her thoughts. He hadn’t slept either, just laid watching her, being there. Equally worried about the small animal and missing his tiny presence between them on the bed, missing his soft furry muzzle resting on his inner arm where he had grown accustomed to it every night.
When the vet rang next morning, she practically yanked his phone out of his hand, devouring every detail and questioning the receptionist with the skill of the Gestapo.
Muffin had woken from sedation in the night, drank some water, responded well and was looking brighter this morning. He was still very sick, but they would have to wait on blood tests to know for sure the extent of what was going on in his little body. All signs looked good for the time being and the vet said she could come and see him around noon if she wanted. They wanted him to stay until the blood work came in, meaning up to forty-eight hours of separation for Rose.
After repeating everything word for word, she avoided conversation with Rob, knowing only too well she would just argue with him over Morag’s involvement. She was sure this was down to that scrawny bitch whether he believed it or not.
She was lifeless, emotionally exhausted and physically tired from lack of sleep. After almost dragging her into the shower and washing her hair, he tried to coax her to eat breakfast. He knew better than to try and push her, leaving her to wrestle with her inner turmoil as he soaped her down and rinsed her in the clean white cubicle. He made no sexual advances, sensing it would not help, but instead held her, kissing her closed eyes when she broke down in relief, holding her tight and murmuring that he loved her when she wrapped herself in him.
* * *
He took her to the clinic a little after noon and left her to sit with Muffin for a little while as he sat with the receptionist, filling out papers and settling the bill so far.
Rose stroked Muffins face through the open cage door, felt his gentle licks and kisses on her face and cried when he warmly nuzzled his little head against her mouth. Whining softly for her to take him out and attempting to get up even though he was still too weakened.
Seeing him a little more like his normal self lifted her heart and brought some peace back to her scattered brain. She wanted him home, but the fear that poison could still wrack his small frame until they were sure of what it was, held her back. She wanted them to ensure no lasting damage and that her little fur baby would completely recover. She wanted to murder that bitch for this, and nothing anyone could say would convince her that Morag wasn’t involved.
On the drive home, Rob informed her he had called off the security staff and downgraded the speed of the fencing and cameras on the manor grounds.
‘Why?’ She turned to him with a furrowed brow and snippy tone, incensed that he was back tracking on his decisions.
‘Because I was being stupid baby. I see that now. Over cautious and I was making you insecure and paranoid and right now we need some calm around the house for a few days.’ He was driving them down a country lane slowly, the sun shining despite the mood in the atmosphere around Rose.
‘You’re wrong. I think she’s entirely capable of carrying out her threats. I think you should still go ahead and finish!’ She turned away from him to look out the window at the passing scenery, annoyed that this was still an issue between them. Pissed that he could really side with Morag on this.
‘Rose... I will finish the house, I just don’t think there is any urgent need. It’s making things crazy.’ He reached out and stroked her cheek, ignoring her shrugging him off with annoyance, her moods had been all over the place for the last twenty-four hours and he wasn’t taking it personally.
‘No Rob, it’s her that’s crazy and I know for a fact she hurt my baby!’ She gritted her teeth, still focused on the view and trying to not raise her voice in temper, she had no energy for another argument today.
‘You don’t know that. You suspect... There is no proof. There’s no reason for her to hurt Muffin. I don’t even think she’s aware of where you stay or that you even have a dog.’
‘Everyone knows us, Rob. Everyone greets Muffin wherever I go; you would have to be dead not to know who I am in this village or who he is to me. My living at the cottage is common knowledge, especially since I became the future Mrs Munro. It wouldn’t be hard to find out, to come there in the cloak of darkness and hide out or leave something for him to find in the garden.’ She spun on him, eyes narrowed and tone tight. She couldn’t believe that he couldn’t see this.
‘I really don’t think she did this, I know her. I’m sorry that I let things get out of hand and made you believe she could do something like this, but Rose... Baby... I swear I don’t think she’s capable of poisoning an innocent dog.’ He squeezed her hand, sure that he was right and convinced he was giving some rest to her suspicions. She listened silently, her eyes watching the scenery once more, knowing arguing was futile and her mind stubbornly set that he was wrong.