She stopped, faltering on the stair and regaining some composure with a shake of her head. She would have to do this, put her chin up and walk by. Get to her car. Smile, say goodbye and leave, feigning bravado for a few moments longer.
‘Undecided about whether you’re coming or going?’ His voice made her freeze, and she was unable to look around. The same tone of heavy sarcasm and mild anger. ‘Maybe should have told you she wasn’t here.’ She looked around in the direction of his voice, catching him lazily watching her from the kitchen door, his body leaning heavily against the frame.
What was he doing? Why was he making it like this?
She couldn’t bare the cold and distant glare anymore, avoiding the way he was staring at her. Glancing around, looking for his new visitor nervously in case she was witnessing this horrid scene, she could feel her body tremble again. He cut in again
‘She didn’t stay! Was passing by and popped in with this.’ He held up a folder with the museum logo on the cover before sliding it back onto the table outside the kitchen door. Still standing on the last step and staring his way now that he had drawn her vision with the file, Rose was unsure what to say. Slightly relieved that Morag was gone.
For the first time in her life, words would not come to her, he was making her crazy nervous, and she couldn’t think straight. Her clammy hands and mouth had suddenly gone very dry, making her even more anxious. Feeling that same prick of emotion in her eyes, she looked away, closing them to blink away any tears and took the last step onto the marble floor.
‘If you’re trying to hurt me... Punish me...It’s working.’ She finally whispered, unable to look his way for fear she would lose all control. There was silence after her words. She couldn’t bare it, couldn’t bare the huge vast emptiness between them and the signs he no longer wanted her. After a moment of pensive waiting, she moved to leave, unable to look back as her emotions held on by a thread.
‘That’s it?’ His voice was cutting and cold. ‘Nothing else to say, Penelope¿ The use of that pet name was enough to break her, knowing he only used it when he was pissed or they were no longer together. A stupid reason to lose all resolve at saving face, but she couldn’t help it.
‘Don’t R...’ Her voice broke. The damn finally breaking under pressure and the torrent of emotion bursting forth, she sunk onto the step helplessly, wrapping her arms around her face and sobbing uncontrollably. Losing all ability to fight it and letting her heartbreak pour out dramatically, like a completely distraught child.
She heard him swear before his footsteps hurriedly came towards her, and his arms pulled her up unexpectedly to cradle against him. She was too angst to dissect what that meant or even push him off.
‘Come on.’ His voice was softer, that harsh tone gone against the side of her hair as he ushered her down the hall towards his room. Thinking better of the closeness to the bed, he pulled her into his office and sat her down in his leather chair gently, letting her go to walk away and return with a box of tissues. Rose continued to stare at her lap, tears falling, unable to meet his eyes and tried to reel back in the flood water. She tried to calm her erratic breathing and took the tissues gratefully, wiping her face and blowing her nose to console herself back to a calmer state. He didn’t say anything, just walked away from her to a nearby unit and immediately back to the edge of the desk beside her seconds later.
‘You forgot something last time you were here.’ His voice was flat and unreadable. He slid something across the desk, the scraping noise bringing her eye up to meet the small black leather ring box that skidded to a halt beside her. Rose glanced up at him in a moment of surprise, her eyes questioning, but his expression was the same cool unreadable as always. Reaching out for it, she clicked it open, revealing his mother’s silver ring and glanced up again in confusion.
‘You’re giving me this back?’ She whispered, her voice shaking and swallowing hard. Her brain was a frenzy of questions and frenzied emotions.
‘Fights are part of the package Rose. Sometimes I’m an asshole, and sometimes you’re unbearable. I’m still pissed at you, and I’m guessing the feeling is mutual, but that doesn’t mean I walk away; you can‘t get rid of me that easily, whether we like each other right now or not. You don’t give up at the first hurdle!’ His voice was still harsh, but the sarcasm was gone, the slight tone of warmth in there somewhere.
Rose bit her lip to stop the sudden tears flowing from complete relief. Closing the box again and pulling it into her lap possessively, she felt another tear escape. This time it was shame. He was keeping his distance, watching her with that unreadable coldness. ‘You didn’t call.’ She brushed the moisture away. ‘Didn’t text.’ Another fell just as quickly. ‘I figured you were done.’ She hated how feeble and quiet she sounded, her heart aching with the effort. She heard him sigh before he moved closer, pulling her chair around slowly as he leaned over her, his face softening as he lifted her chin to meet his eyes. Shaking his head, he gently brushed away a tear with his thumb, drawing her closer so they could lock eyes.
‘I was being a man. It’s what we do when we’re pissed and trying to balance a lot of shit at once. We clam up...I’m used to dealing with things alone...We fought, Rose. That’s all it was. I didn’t want to talk to you until I calmed down. I knew I would say things I didn’t mean and hurt you.’ He slid down onto his knees, taking the box from her lap and retrieving her ring from inside before throwing the box back on the table carelessly. He lifted her hand, sliding it back on her finger slowly, stopping to kiss the bruises from her overeager removal days before. That small, tender act made her heart ache anew as she gazed at him with wide eyes and a fluttering heartbeat.
‘Thought you said once it came off, it stayed off?’ She was watching him now, her emotions calming slowly, his beautiful face, smooth and devoid of anger giving her peace. His eyes were pale and soft as the storms moved away. While her manic emotions were being brought back under control, warmth began returning to his features completely.
‘I lied.’ He looked up, still holding her hand in his, a look on his face she couldn’t read. He sighed again, shaking his head gently at her, a small smile breaking across his face. ‘What am I going to do with you, Penny?’
She shrugged, still feeling fragile, looking up at him coquettishly and longing for him to touch her properly. To wipe away this excruciating tension between them and smooth over the last torn parts of her heart, convince her they were okay. He gazed at her for a long moment.
‘If you want a kiss, you need to come closer.’ He smiled softly as though reading her mind, that familiar twinkle appearing in his eye and revealing the Rob she had been aching to see. She didn’t need to be told twice. Obediently she moved forward towards him.
He didn’t hesitate, moving purposely at her, brushing their noses gently, dragging out the agony and finding her lips in a slow, confident movement, parting them easily. He sunk his mouth against hers. Softly at first, enjoying the touch of her against him once more, savouring the feeling of her breath against him after a weekend of hell and just breathing her in. Losing himself in the one place he had been longing to be. It was a kiss to wipe away the pain and anger, slow and tender, feelings of relief washing over them.
He didn’t need to say anything more. The kiss said it all. As though they had been holding their breath, waiting to exhale, the surge of emotion and longing, forgiveness and relief all wrapped up in the tender moment; his hands found her face to pull her closer. His mouth deepened the kiss, making it clear he was no longer mad at her, she was no longer angry at him, and they were doing what they did best to fix all the hurt.
Sitting back on his haunches and gently smoothing back her hair in that familiar affectionate way, he smiled, bringing her eyes to meet his.
‘Promise me, baby... Promise me that no matter what we fight about, no matter how bad or how big it feels...That you will never doubt how much I love you or that I’m in this for the long haul... For the forever.’ He kissed her gently on the forehead. ‘I will always come back for you...Even if I need a few days to cool off from that infamous Munro temper... I’m sorry about the way I behaved...The things I said, I was being a dickhead.’
‘I promise.’ She reached out, kissing him again gently and was met with no rejection. Her heart filled with joy at the ability to do this once more, to feel secure that they were still together and engaged. ‘I’m sorry I threw your ring back at you... I‘m sorry I acted like a crazy bitch.’ She rested her forehead against his jaw, breathing in the smell of him as her nose grazed his throat, enjoying his arms around her and feeling like this was all she ever needed in the world to feel content.
‘I deserved it.’ He mumbled huskily.
‘I know.’ She smiled weakly at him, now eye level again as he frowned in mild mock outrage and scooped her out of the chair in an easy swipe, sending the items on his desk flying and the chair spinning uncontrollably. Rose squealed at the suddenness of it, caught up in a bundle high in his arms.
‘I know how to make it up to you, though.’ He kissed her firmly again on the mouth, moving her back to the desk and sliding her butt onto the smooth surface. Swiping the rest of the stuff from behind her off the edge with one arm, straight to the floor in a clattering mess. He didn’t break free until he had pushed her down to lie across the smooth wooden expanse. ‘I have thought of nothing else for days.’
‘Really? Even while hating me?’ Her voice was heavy with anticipation, breathless at his passionate kiss.
‘There’s nothing like make-up sex. All that pent-up anger and frustration. Even pissed, I would never hate you, baby. I couldn’t stop thinking about you.’ That dirty twinkle in his eye, all return of that boyish grin and relaxed face. ‘Knowing just how fiery and passionate you are... I know you won’t disappoint.’
He didn’t give her a chance to reply, leaning down to capture her mouth, igniting that burning desire quickly, their hands clawing at each other’s clothes in a frenzy that overtook almost instantaneously.
With her legs hanging off the desk freely so that the only place she had to put them was around his waist, he was all over her, kissing and nibbling and pulling her free of any garments covering her skin as she followed suit, yanking his t-shirt over his head and raking her nails over that expanse of his chiselled torso and muscular shoulders.
It was with the same feverish urgency and wild passion of their reunion in Abby’s bathroom. That surge of insane need to be joined with one another, naked and writhing, only this was more intense, more frenzied and full on. They weren’t drunk this time, they were fueled by days of anger and heartache, and the craving need was overwhelming.
Rose was not normally one to move above a moaning and writhing when she climaxed, but he had her calling out, groaning and panting in ecstasy. She could not control her cries as the tidal wave of orgasmic ripples crashed over her. His muffled moans were lost in her neck in unison as they came crashing down, sated, on top of the desk after only minutes of hot, hard sex. It was definitely a keeper for the memory bank, not the longest session in which he had devoured her body but the most primal and passionate to date.
Heavy breathing, sweat droplets spritzed over their naked skin as they began to untangle limbs, still Rose lying flat on the hard desktop. Rob gave a satisfied groan as he moved to get off her, bracing on his palms by her head and leaning in to give her a slow, long, gentle kiss, his tongue brushing hers yet not fueling more lust. This was a ‘thank you for making my day’ kind of kiss.
He moved back, straightening his arms to let her up, her legs still around his waist as he suddenly froze. She felt him stiffen over her. The change of atmosphere and the small noise which escaped his throat had Rose lift her head and look up at him. Still leaning over her, she realised he was looking at the door and followed his gaze.
Her blood instantly ran cold, her heart stopped, and her legs lost all capability of staying around his waist. She inhaled sharply at the sight before her. Morag stood in the doorway, wild-eyed, mouth open, chest heaving. Like a woman on the verge of a massive breakdown, she was holding some folders in her hands, and as they slid to the floor, she made an incomprehensible cry.
Rob turned back to Rose, a frown of regret instantly across his face and a murmured curse as he quickly released her. Pulling her up to sit on the desk and pulling his clothes up with one hand. The urgency of their need for each other meant his jeans and boxers had stayed close to where they were meant to sit.
He fully pulled Rose up off the surface, helping her to her feet and standing in front of her so he was shielding her modesty and handing her her clothes. His t-shirt was lying on the chair by Morag’s side, so she was left alone for the time being as he proceeded to right himself. Rose hurriedly covered up, standing behind him, facing away and pulling her dress over her nakedness, hastily kicking her lace panties under the desk. Her face was burning with the heat of complete mortification of the situation they had suddenly found themselves in.
Fuck, fuck, fuck
‘Morag, come to the kitchen with me, and we can talk.’ Rob was speaking soothingly, but she was shaking her head, the tears falling freely.
‘It was her?’ Pointing past him as Rose turned towards them, pulling her shoes from under the desk and trying to calm her elevated pulse and shaking limbs. She couldn’t look the redhead in the eye.
‘Her? All along? Your kid sister’s mate? What is she even twenty yet?’ Morag spat, her voice high pitched and cracking, the obvious extreme distress all over her.
Rob seemed lost for words for a moment, sighing and trying hard to think fast and make this less traumatic. Trying to manoeuvre her into the next room, trying to make her follow. Morag’s gaze was intent on Rose, standing openly, looking at every inch of her. Hating her.
‘Rose is twenty-seven, Morag. You knew there was someone. It’s not like I haven’t kept trying to tell you… Yes, it’s been her all along.’ He had given up trying to turn her and instead pulled the seat forward from the door frame, lifting his top and sliding her down on the chair with little resistance. Morag was too focused on open-mouthed staring at Rose.
‘I’m sorry that you saw that and walked in on us...’ He pulled it on, covering his tanned torso; the spattering of hair across his body glistened a little with the exertion of what they had just done still.
Rose had nowhere to go. Trapped in the room with her only close exit being closed in by Morag sobbing in the chair he had pulled in front of it. Morag looked at him with an accusation
‘You bastard!’ Morag sobbed again; her voice had lost conviction and fire, and she sounded helpless and hopeless. Rob sighed and slid down to his knees in front of her, looking at Rose for help, but she stood motionless like a deer in headlights, unable to offer a single word of support. Wide-eyed and completely out of her depth. All she could muster was a slight shrug and a head shake. She knew her face was probably blushed and hot and her hair wild, so she concentrated on trying to remove the remnants of their lovemaking from her appearance.
‘Morag... I love her. This isn’t some affair or casual thing.’ He was trying so hard to be gentle, his voice low and calm, his eyes on the woman’s face once more as she silently cried. ‘I never wanted to hurt you, but I can’t go on living this way.’ Morag turned towards him and stared. Tears were falling. Face crumbling still but no verbal response.
Rose sunk into his chair and tried to keep her vision on other things, not the intimate way they were facing one another closely. The mess on the floor of the stuff he had swiped off. His laptop was teetering dangerously close to the far corner of the smooth surface and looking to tumble off at any second. The picture frame they had accidentally broken laying in pieces under the edge of the desk near her lacy underwear. Her pink bra was hanging from the curtain pole over the window in a distasteful manner and not exactly what she wanted Morag to see, adding more insult to injury.
Rose couldn’t offer anything in the way of useful dialogue. The woman glared at her now and then as she swung from Rob’s face to Rose’s with so much hatred and confusion. Rose wanted the ground to open up and swallow her whole. Rob was trying to help, dabbing Morag’s face with a tissue, uneasy at the lack of reaction and calm tearful posture. Even Rose knew this was out of character for Morag, this weird quiet response and lack of hysterics.
‘How long?’ She finally broke the silence, and her calculated gaze landed once more on Rose’s face. ‘How long have you been screwing her?’
He looked startled by the question but didn’t falter, didn’t rephrase her question for her, knowing she was acting out of pain and hurt.
‘On and off for a few months. After the charity dance, a week or so after.’ He sounded remorseful, knowing that lying to her, hiding this from her in the beginning, had been wrong. Regretting it now that they were here and realising this admission only made things so much worse for her to swallow.
‘Earlier? Acting like she was here to see Abby...Was that part of the charade for my benefit?’ Morag sounded venomous, anger seeping through her shock and upset, her voice hitching slightly. Rose could see the woman’s hands trembling in a mirror to her own.
‘No.’ He glanced back at Rose, seeing her tense awkwardness and throwing her a supportive look, a weak smile and a little look that was somehow apologetic. ‘We were fighting. I was being an asshole.’ Rose gave him a small smile, warmed that even at this moment, he would still look at her that way and say sorry in his own way.
‘But other times we saw her? That was pretence, right?’ Morag snapped his attention back with more accusations, her tone haughtier with every word as though she was slowly building from desolate to fury.
‘Not always, it was complicated, and we broke up for a while... But there were times...Yes... That we acted like nothing was going on. I didn’t want to hurt you more than I was, Morag. You need to understand that all of it was for your benefit. To protect you.’
‘How is lying to me and hiding the truth protecting me? You have been sneaking around with her, letting me believe everything was fine.’ The pain was so much more to bear than she was capable of as she tried to process all the facts. She struggled to piece things together through the haze of the pills they had been making her take while forcing down the unbearable betrayal.
‘Morag... I have tried to tell you so many times I was seeing someone. I even told you I was in love with her. When I brought you home again, I told you I was serious about someone and tried to talk to you even then, but you wouldn’t listen. You go off on one and become delusional, denying it and then acting like it’s not happening. We have been going around in circles for weeks with this. We weren’t fine... Hiding my love life so as not to upset you isn’t fine or normal, Morag. We’re friends, nothing more. It shouldn’t have to be like this.’ Rob tried to reason with her, no longer drying her tears; instead, his hand was covering hers on her knee. Giving her gentle comfort, and despite knowing it was platonic for him, Rose had to look away as the tiny bite of jealousy hit her in the stomach.