AMANDA
I'm returning to the city, and I really hope my house is already empty. My mood is to lock myself away from the world and just think everything over. The phone rings, and the screen lights up with the name "Adam."
- What the hell does he want? - I continue to ignore it. I don’t want to hear any excuses. I’ve had enough honesty for today. I ignore it for a long time, but at the last second, I can’t hold back and answer the call:
- What do you want? - I put as much anger into my voice as I can, but his next words make me stop the car.
- I love you, Kitten, as much as I have for all these seven years. - the man goes silent, only strange voices and noise in the background.
- Adam, where are you? - Silence. Just background voices. - Can you hear me? - But he doesn't reply anymore.
I end the call and try again. No answer. I call for the tenth time when finally someone picks up.
- Adam, what's going on? - if this is some game again, I’ll strangle him with my own hands.
- The man was taken by ambulance. He got into an accident, and his phone was found in the car. - my heart jumps out of my chest.
- This is some kind of curse. - so many events in such a short time make me believe even in things I never believed in.
- Do you know where they took him? - I have to see him. I must make sure he will be alright.
- If I'm not mistaken, to the central hospital. - I hang up and step on the gas.
I jump out of the car and run into the building. At the reception stands a nurse:
- Can I help you with something? - I turn my head towards her and realize she is speaking to me.
- Adam Kelly, brought in by ambulance after an accident. What’s wrong with him? - she starts checking something in the system, and another wave of anxiety engulfs me.
- Yes, he’s in surgery. Please wait. - The nurse leads me to a chair, and I wearily collapse into it, resting my head on my hands.
Time passes too slowly. No one comes up to me or says anything. I’m scared to think about what’s happening in there.
I’m afraid we ended everything on that note. I lost him once already, but I don’t want to lose him again. Maybe we’ll never be together, but I need to know he’s somewhere. That he’s alright.
Seven years ago...
It’s as if Adam had been replaced. I just can’t believe he could have just used me.
- He couldn’t have... - but I heard his words, so cruel, and the cold gaze that pierced right to my bones.
Is this it? Am I just another toy to him?
- Exactly. He explained it to you very well. - Tears silently roll down my cheeks, and I don’t even try to stop them. It hurts so much that I want to tear my skin off to rid myself of memories of the warmth of his hands forever.
I come home, and at the door, I see my mom.
- Amanda, what happened? - she looks concerned, just like she has since their return.
- Nothing. - I pass her by because I will never tell her what really happened. She warned me, and I, naive fool, believed that our story would be different.
- Darling. - mom takes my hand, and I turn my head. - He’s not worth it. Believe me, men like him don’t know how to love. I know it for sure. - In her eyes is a pain so deep that I wonder how I never noticed it before.
- I want to sleep. - I close myself in my room and cry until morning, until the last tears dry on my cheeks, until I make a decision - to leave, erase Adam from my life, and never come back here again.
In the morning, I pack my bags and tell my parents I want to leave for London a few days earlier to settle in. To my surprise, they agree. Moreover, some acquaintance of Dad’s offered me an apartment so I wouldn't have to stay in a dorm. And without my knowledge, my parents accepted this offer. But none of this matters. The only thing I want is to leave here and forget these past two months as if they never were.
The flight is in half an hour. My parents take me to the airport, and while Dad is retrieving my suitcase, I look across the street because there’s a familiar car parked, with the window rolled down. I know for sure he’s watching. My last hope:
- Tell me it’s all a lie... I whisper to myself, but the Toyota drives away, and the last shard of my heart crumbles into dust...
- Are you here for Adam Kelly? - in front of me stands a doctor, around fifty.
- Yes, what’s wrong with him? - he adjusts his glasses while I dig my nails into my palm.
- Critical condition. Serious injuries to the legs and head. We’re waiting until morning. We’ve done everything we can; now it depends on him. - My head starts spinning, and I fall into a chair.
- Can I see him? - I need to see him, or else I’ll go crazy.
- Come back in the morning. - the doctor leaves, leaving me sitting outside the room. I don’t know what to do. I should probably go home, take a shower, and change. But instead of returning to my apartment, I go to my parents' house. The door is open, but there’s no one inside. I immediately go to the shower, where I stay for far too long. Water used to soothe me, or maybe it just hid the tears I vowed never to show anyone. I put on a robe and head to the kitchen. I need to drink some coffee because the whiskey has worn off, but fatigue reminds me of itself.
I make coffee and approach the table where an empty whiskey bottle stands. If Adam drank it all, then I understand why he couldn’t control the car. I clean it up and only then notice a piece of paper with something written on it. I sit down at the table and start reading, but from the first words, my eyes blind with tears. I wipe them and continue: